Temptation

Today I noticed a strange temptation, the temptation to make the place that I am like the place that I was. Think about that for a moment.

One the one hand, it's perfectly natural to set your bed up the way you like it, and to put some pictures of home on the wall. No one would rebuke you for that. It's also natural to check emails and post pictures so that friends can keep track of your adventure. I consider it borderline selfish to not share your life and your adventure with your friends and family that want to join with you in it.

What I would argue is not good is bringing over some of my habits regarding how I spend my free time. Back in Carpinteria I was content to distract myself all day until it was time to go to bed. I would spend hours online watching different videos, and reading different articles, and watching different shows on Hulu.

Now that I find myself with some free time, I find that I'm tempted to distract myself until dinner with similar things. However, that is not the design of this place. This DTS was set up in such a way so that I would grow closer to God and learn more about Him. I should be spending my free time with that in mind. It would be a terrible waste to have this time, and not use it in that way.

I see similar things happening in all of the other students. They are on vacation, not in boot camp. Playing is a greater priority than studying. During classes, everyone used to take lots of notes. Now people mostly slouch in their chairs and listen. I admit I do it too sometimes.

Then when I look out the window, I'm reminded that I'm not in Carpinteria. I'm in Romania, and I'm reminded of why I came to Romania. I came with a purpose: to grow closer to God. I should spend my free time praying, and reading the different books they're giving me, and filling out the journals they give me, and meditating on the teachings.

What's the point of coming to a DTS if you're not willing to do those things? Imagine going to the barber and refusing a haircut. Imagine going to the gym to eat fast food, and sit on the couches. What's the point? At best you're there with the wrong purpose in mind. At worst you are actively distracting and hindering the other people that are there.

People go to the barber to get a hair cut and if you're playing with all of the scissors, then they can't do that. Likewise, if you're handing out french fries to everyone at the gym, they're going to gain weight instead of lose it.

The more I think about it, the more I wonder about how much this situation parallels life as a whole and what is mentioned in 2 Corinthians 5:17.

"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new."

When Jesus enters the picture, you're a new person. Don't bring those old habits with you. Leave them all behind. You're in a new place now, with a new purpose. Even year to year you can do this. Don't let the things that tempted you and caused you to stumble in 2010 do the same in 2011. Leave them all behind.

I'm probably guilty of this the most. Year after year I'd do the same things, and stumble in all the same ways. There was no growth. If you compared 2010 with 2005, I was probably the same person. I'm going to try my best to be better in 2011 than I was in 2010. From your perspective, you may not notice any changes, but from my perspective and God's perspective, there's going to be some changes.